Each year divorce affects thousands of families. Children may react in different ways depending on a variety of factors. How old they are, their temperament and the circumstances will all play a role in how they respond.
Although they will no doubt be affected by your divorce, you can still help ease the shock by helping them cope. With enough support and love, you can encourage them to grow into healthy and happy adults.
Here are some of the best tips for helping your child handle accepting your divorce.
Be Open With Them
Once you are certain that divorce is imminent, you should break the news to your children. Dancing around the subject will only make things worse. Therefore, be straightforward about your decision to no longer be a couple.
You may want to practice how you’ll tell them by going over a rough script. You should anticipate potentially having to handle some anger on their part or even self-blame. The most important message that you should convey is that it’s not their fault, and give plenty of reassurance.
Prepare Them For The Upcoming Changes
Give your kids the time to digest the fact that there will be a lot of upcoming changes. While there’s no need to go into all the details, you should give them a general idea of what to expect.
Prepare them for whatever the new living situation will be that you and your ex determine who has custody. Hopefully, you will be able to focus on the well-being of the kids and decide on a situation what works for everyone.
Keep Routines Up As Much As Possible
Kids thrive off of routine and need it to feel secure. When they experience significant changes in their lives, routine helps them feel normalcy.
While you may not be able to uphold every routine, try as much as you can to give them a sense of security. Keep going to dance classes, have family game night, and it’s especially important for younger children to maintain their nighttime routines as closely as possible.
Be Patient With Their Reactions
Your children may have a variety of reactions from anger to sadness. It may take patience on your part to have self-control during the tough moments. Anticipate tantrums, some tears, and possibly some anger aimed towards you.
If your child starts to show behavior issues at school, try to work closely with their teacher. By remaining in communication about their progress, hopefully, you can arrive at a solution.
One of the best things you can do for your children is to be a good parent. The only way you’ll be able to give to them is to give to yourself. Cut yourself some slack and stop blaming yourself too much.
Focus on giving yourself the love that your children also deserve.