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Finding your identity after motherhood

Motherhood is an assortment of highs and lows, frustration and love, joy and sadness. When you become a mother you have to give up some of what you prized in your life before baby. Regular date nights, showering every day and staying up past 9 pm are all things that go.

It is not uncommon to feel although, in order to be a great mother, you have to give up everything about yourself that makes you, you.  Many parents lose themselves to motherhood and allow every single part of them to become completely consumed with being a mother.

It can be a struggle not to feel selfish when you want to do something for yourself, but taking care of you will go a long way when it comes to taking care of your children. A burnt out mother cannot possibly perform at her best. So, in order to do the best possible job in the world, at the most important job in the world of raising your children, be sure to take some you time.

This article explains how to help you stay connected with your true self when you are a parent. By nurturing yourself, you will do a better job of nurturing your child.

  1. Do things just for you

If you’ve been thinking about doing something for a while, just do it. Stop finding excuses and tell yourself that you do deserve to do this. It could be anything from trying out a new yoga class, applying for a job or starting your own mummy blog. Make a conscious effort to follow through with those promises we make to ourselves but never get around to doing.

It is possible to not be a mum just for an afternoon or a day. No one will criticise you and you won’t be doing any damage to your children what so ever. You will find it puts a spring back into your step and lift your spirits.

  1. Do things on your own

Doing things on your own is the biggest confidence builder there is. If you have always gone out with your children, you can eventually begin to feel uneasy about going out without them. They become a type of amour to protect you; this is not a good routine to get stuck into.

When you get an opportunity, do something on your own, go to the cinema or an art gallery. Among all of the play dates, house work, dirty nappies and routines, being on your own is a luxury and should be enjoyed to give you head space and clarity.

  1. Make new friends

It is common for parents to feel isolated and lonely when they enter motherhood and this contributes to significantly feeling a lack of identity. Friendships play a huge part in defining us so without girly hang out time; it erodes a little part of us away. This then leads to less confidence in social situations because you almost forget how to socialise with other adults.

It is essential to put yourself out there with other people. Find other mums you can be friends with, chatting with people in a similar situation to you can make you feel better and yourself. There nothing like a gossip round your friend’s house while the children play together.

  1. Indulge in some luxury

How many times have you gone to the shopping centre and come back with a whole new outfit for your child or spent all day walking around a children’s park getting excited about a Peppa-Pig appearance? It’s time to take a luxury day out for you. Have some retail therapy and buy a new outfit or some make-up. Spend the day at a spa and indulge in a back massage to relieve some stress, spa days in Glasgow offer a full range of treatments to improve relaxation and health through personal care.

It’s time to be selfish, just for a day. Do something you have always dreamed of but never done. Experiences are a big part of our identity and good ones will shape how you act and who you are.

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